A Letter to my Book "The Colour Red"

If you’ve been around for a while, you remember when I wrote letters to my two other finished books: Chords, and Broken. I stole this idea from Hailey Rose, who stole this from someone else. Today’s letter is addressed to my latest WIP, The Colour Red.

Dear Colour Red (a.k.a. CR),

I have a history of having sudden flash fiction ideas that snowball into novels. But I really didn’t expect you to. You see, I have a habit of making up random stories and scenes in my head and just writing them out and seeing where they go. They can get rather elaborate and even long-lasting. Originally, that’s what you were. I started a random story about a girl writer who was writing... and as I began to think out the words she was writing, she was forgotten and only her story remained. Looking back now, I see that story was the product of many videos, a contemporary police book I’d just read (Healing Their Hearts by Cleopatra Margot), the current WIP of a friend, and a story-in-my-head that had been going on for a long time. But at the time, the story was utterly new and quite dazzling. 

I soon got off my swing, where I do most of this story-spinning, and went inside to help with supper. But I didn’t forget my story. And that night when I sat down to write with my friends, I told them of my story and how I wished I could write it.

“So why don’t you?” demanded Kassie. 

“I don’t know how. I can’t. It’s all stuff I haven’t experienced,” I answered.

Nevertheless, Kass insisted I write down the scenes anyways before I forgot them. (Thank her for me.) 

So I wrote out my rough outline. And I wrote out the scenes I remembered, bemoaning that I’d forgotten some and also forgotten the best parts. And then I went back to the beginning and started writing the story.

If I remember correctly, I got over 2,000 words written that night. And we were off. I had my message, my plot, and my characters. 

This was on the second-to-last week of May. As social media and the entire U.S. (or so it seemed to me) erupted into chaos, I was burdened with the message that filled my heart: Stop judging people by anything but what they are themselves. And I kept writing. 

I ran into some obstacles. You took place in my made-up country of Kalsyia, but… what was Kalsyia?? I had to figure that out. So I did world-building. I drew a map. It was fun and frustrating. Slowly things began to come together… the people, the history, the geography, the current events… 

And I kept writing. The words just poured out. I had easily over 1,000 words almost every night. But I also hit places where the words wouldn’t come and I didn’t know what to do… and had to brainstorm and look at my outline and ask for ideas. 

I feel like I say this every time, but you were a book of big firsts.

I wrote you during my first and second university courses, and in the midst of a lot of other issues. You were a way God used to help me manage the stress and fear of adulting, university, the whole riots/police defunding, the coronavirus, and more. He used you to bring me a lot of peace as I focused on love and comfort instead of hatred and uncertainty. 

You had my first official Pinterest mood board and I love it so insanely much. 

You made me cry so much while writing you. Even more than Broken did. 

You didn’t hit much further than 50k—only 65,000 or so. But for once I didn’t care. Your size didn’t really matter. Your message mattered. 

You were the WIP I wrote during our first King’s Daughters’ Writing Camp. You had the largest group of fangirls I ever had. You also started an awful lot of conversations and gained me an everlasting reputation as a conversation starter. 

But more importantly: you tackled one of my biggest writing handicaps. The “I don’t rewrite” handicap. For years I told myself that having to rewrite a book meant it was bad. But as I wrote you I realized that I really had to rewrite Chords. And that was okay. I hadn’t had all the puzzle pieces back then. But it had had to be written anyways. It was bad, but God had really used it so mightily in my writing life. It hadn’t been a waste. As I wrote you, I had to keep going back and writing big and small scenes that I had forgotten but were necessary. Over and over and over. You were the book that, more than any other, tackled topics I really had no clue about and had to swallow my pride, backtrack, and rewrite. It was frustrating. But I knew it was okay. It was just part of the writing process.

You were the first book where I got into disagreements with dear friends over the theology. You drove me to the Bible to find answers for myself. You made me pore over Bible verses to figure things out.

You were the first story where I had official beta-readers. That was fantastically exciting. Their critique was a huge blow to my pride, even if it’s barely begun. But that was needed. I had to be reminded that critique was necessary. That’s why last year critique was so hard for me. It was to prepare me. To show me that it’s okay if the first draft is trash. 

You drove me to do actual research, even more than Broken did. (But why do you two insist on making me research that horrible medical stuff?)

You were the book that God used to snap together the puzzle pieces for things that had been really frustrating me. 

You were the first of my stories that didn’t teach me a huge message I’d been needing. Rather, God used you to show me how far He’s taken me. To show me that last year, awful as it was, was really useful to me. That His plans are perfect and no trial is ever wasted. 

You took a trope I adored and finally crafted a story about it. 

You took my silly story in my head that will never be written out and wrote it out in another way. 

You were the first time I wrote out a message that God has really been lying hard on my heart. 

And you fulfilled my lifelong goal of writing about policemen.

You were a story I put both a lot and a very little of myself into. 

You brought me heartbreak towards the end, when something I badly wanted didn’t happen. But God got me through it, and now I have no bitterness.

Again, God used you to show me how far He has brought me since this time a year ago, with my puny 48k novel that needs to be severely rewritten. I can’t even begin to list all the ways I’ve grown since then.

I don’t know who you’ll touch. I don’t even know who’ll read you. I don’t know who will hear and heed your message. I don’t know what other message God will use you to teach. I don’t know if you’ll fulfill my goal and be published or not. I don’t know if you’ll end up having to be totally rewritten. I don’t know anything. 

Except this:

God gave me this story for a reason. My time has not been wasted writing it, no matter what. He’s gonna use you, or has used you, somehow, for me or for somebody else. 

And His plan is perfect. 

I love all my characters. But Jay is my “baby,” now and forever. Officer Randall will forever be special to me… for a very special reason that maybe someday I’ll share. And Orlando will always have a very special corner of my heart… for another special reason that I may never share. 

You, CR, are the first book of many. 

It’s sad to say goodbye.

But I can’t wait to start your sequel.

So, goodbye, CR. I don’t know where you’re heading or what your journey will be. But I know that the Master Storyteller has a perfect plan for this little book I’ve written. 

Lovingly,

Your author

7 Days of Hope Blog Tour

                 

Hope.

Don't we all need it?

Aren't we all looking for it?

When I heard of this blog tour I was really impressed. And I knew I had to join in if I possibly could.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TvA6PYa54sg&list=PLc59ZMsm8vK9ypZejk704KWCdGNGxyU0u&index=5&t=0s

This song has recently become a huge comfort to me. Particularly the third verse:

O Joy that seekest me through pain,

I cannot close my heart to thee;

I trace the rainbow thro’ the rain,

And feel the promise is not vain

That morn shall tearless be.

There is hope, dear. There is a rainbow in the rain. There will be a tearless morn. God is good. There is beauty in the rain. His promises still hold, even in the storm.

Two of my favourite quotes are the following:

"Weeping may endure for a night, but joy cometh in the morning." (Psalm 30:5). 

"It is of the Lord’s mercies that we are not consumed, because His compassions fail not. They are new every morning: great is Thy faithfulness." (Lamentations 3:22-23). 

Recently I have struggled hard with finding hope. Everything was so broken, so miserable, so uncertain. But one thing God has taught me this year is to choose to have hope. He has taught me there’s good coming around the bend. There’s wonder and beauty in everything. There’s always joy and love to be found. Choose to live a happy, beautiful life and life will be happy & beautiful for you. Choose to love and be happy, and you will make others love and be happy. It’s your attitude and choices and lifestyle that makes life hard or ugly or unhappy. Choose joy, and don’t give up hope. Good things are coming, dear ones. Keep noticing the roses. Choose to have a lovely life, and life will be lovely. God is good. Don't give up hope. 

Because our God is a God of Hope. 

“For whatsoever things were written aforetime were written for our learning, that we through patience and comfort of the scriptures might have hope.” (Romans 15:4). 

Everything in the Bible was written ahead of time—because God knew we’d need it—to give us knowledge, patience, and consolation, so that we might have hope. Knowledge—“we know that all things work together for good to them that love God….” Patience—we wait for His hand to work, His time to come, and we continue to serve as we wait. Consolation—we know He loves us and allows all for our good, that His plan is best and will come to pass. And from all this, we have hope—a firm belief and knowledge that all will be well and that the ending to our story is Heaven—the Father’s house.

Keep holding on to hope, friends. <33

And now, here's the rest of the blog tour. Definitely go check out these ladies!

Day 1 (August 16) - SawyerMarie (https://sundropgirls.wordpress.com/)

Day 2 (August 17)- Brooklyn Elysse (http://bensshowersofblessings.blogspot.com/)

Day 3 (August 18)- Katja (https://littleblossomsforjesus.blogspot.com/)

Day 4 (August 19)- Brooklyn (http://fiveshekels.wordpress.com/)

Day 5 (August 20)- Emma (https://sevenbillionsmiles.home.blog)

Day 6 (August 21)- Ellen (http://musingsbyellen.blogspot.com/)

Day 7 (August 22)-Abby Elissa (https://abbyelissa.blogspot.com/)

10 Ways to Make a Friend's Day

Hi, friends. :) Today I have a list of things that I have found to bless me. They're things that have made a grey day better, touched my heart, and made me feel loved. They're things which I want to remember to do for my friends. I hope this list can be inspiring for you too. :)

1. Make them a compliment.
It's always nice to let someone know how beautiful they are, or how creative their project is, or how cool their story is, or how nice their new hairstyle is. It always brightens my day when someone tells me something along those lines. It doesn't have to make me prideful (I'm trying hard to combat that) but it can just make me happy to know someone thinks I did a good job or that I actually look nice today. :)

2. Listen to them & offer sympathy &/or advice.
We all need a shoulder to cry on, or a listening ear to pour our troubles in. We need Godly friends who'll point us to Christ and offer sage advice. It can make a big difference to spill it all out, even if the friend can't really do much but let us know they care. It's very freeing to know I have friends who let me vent and love me hard even if they can't fix my problems. Let your friend know you're always ready to listen and help if you can. It makes a difference. 

3. Pray for them & let them know you are praying. 
This I am guilty of often forgetting. It's easy to say "I'm praying" but how often do we actually remember? Write out a list. Hang it in a prominent place so you remember to pray often for the people on it. Make it a priority. And let them know it's a priority. Randomly asking, "Hey, how can I pray for you today?" or "I'm rewriting my prayer lists--is there anything I can pray about for you?" lets them know you're serious. There was a time when I would message people and say, "Just wanted you to know I'm praying for you today" and the responses I got were amazing... "I've been really struggling today and your message really encouraged me." You never know when a message like that can make a difference.

4. Randomly check up on them.
I can tell you nothing warms my heart like suddenly seeing a message in my inbox that says, "Hey, dear, I'm thinking of you today. How are you?" It's a small act of kindness, but it goes so far. <33 

5. Express interest in their moments.
Is your friend enjoying the arrival of a new kitten? Worrying over a computer problem? Struggling with editing? Screaming over a new car? Whatever is happening in their life right now, big or small, that they share about--let them know you care. A one-sentence comment, an emoji... it means you are willing to make time for them.

6. Tell them what they mean to you. 
Whether it's a random message or the end of a conversation, a birthday post or a quick shoutout... let your friends know what they mean to you and how God has used them in your life. When a person gets bogged down in all the things they've done wrong, all their problems the reminder that they touched someone's life, that their pain was used to help someone else--that really blesses and gives new courage. 

7. If they have a business, book, blog, anything like that, give them a review or shoutout on social media.
Reviews &/or shoutouts make a difference! Share about your friend's book, business, blog, bookstagram, etc. Talk about it. Let people know how awesome it is. xP If you can't honestly recommend it, then don't; but if you can, do! 

8. Send them a letter or card, maybe a little gift. 
Mail is just so special to get. Just adding stickers, wash tape, quotes, & pretty lettering makes a letter even more special! 'A little gift' needn't be big, either. A bookmark, a keychain, a painting, a poem... there are many inexpensive little gifts you can send your friend. Birthday/Christmas presents are super fun, but so are random, unexpected ones! 

9. Share with them what God’s been teaching you.
It can be really encouraging to hear of how God is working in people's lives. We are supposed to build each other up and encourage one another in Christ, but how can we if we never talk of Him? Share the Bible verses, the sermon notes, the passages from your devotions, the hymns... Talk of your mutual Saviour & God and rejoice together. 

10. Ask how a current project of theirs is going. 
When you're working hard on a book, blog, painting, or any other project, it's heartening to know someone else remembers you're invested in it and is genuinely interested in how it's coming along! You encouragement might just be the thing to get them through writer's block, discouragement, or weariness. :)

~ / / ~

There you are! What are some ways you bless/are blessed by your friends? 

Speaking Truth

Many of you know I've been on a challenge to read through the English Bible in a year. So far I've made my way through most of Israel's history. I am currently going through the life of Jeremiah and the history surrounding his lifetime. 

Jeremiah had a hard life. He started his ministry as a young man, maybe my age, and was afraid of how he'd be treated for prophesying and saying God's truth. 

"Then said I, Ah, Lord God! behold, I cannot speak: for I am a child. But the Lord said unto me, Say not, I am a child: for thou shalt go to all that I shall send thee, and whatsoever I command thee thou shalt speak. Be not afraid of their faces: for I am with thee to deliver thee, saith the Lord." (Jeremiah 1:6-8)

So Jeremiah began his ministry. It was hard. He was unable to marry or have children. He was hugely disliked by basically everyone. The King and the leaders wanted to kill him or at least harm him (and tried to/did more than once). He was in and out of prison. He was thrown down pits full of mud. He was placed in stocks. His name was slandered.  Jeremiah spoke for YEARS to the King and to the people (about 40 years or so, they say). Warning them. Pleading with them. Agonizing over their bad choices. Begging God to have mercy on them. Speaking the truth in spite of being threatened and hated. 

That is a loooooong forty years. 

There are two episodes in Jeremiah's life that really strike me. 

"And it came to pass the same year, in the beginning of the reign of Zedekiah king of Judah, in the fourth year, and in the fifth month, that Hananiah the son of Azur the prophet, which was of Gibeon, spake unto me in the house of the Lord, in the presence of the priests and of all the people, saying, Thus speaketh the Lord of hosts, the God of Israel, saying, I have broken the yoke of the king of Babylon. Within two full years will I bring again into this place all the vessels of the Lord’s house, that Nebuchadnezzar king of Babylon took away from this place, and carried them to Babylon: and I will bring again to this place Jeconiah the son of Jehoiakim king of Judah, with all the captives of Judah, that went into Babylon, saith the Lord: for I will break the yoke of the king of Babylon. 

"Then the prophet Jeremiah said unto the prophet Hananiah in the presence of the priests, and in the presence of all the people that stood in the house of the Lord, even the prophet Jeremiah said, Amen: the Lord do so: the Lord perform thy words which thou hast prophesied, to bring again the vessels of the Lord’s house, and all that is carried away captive, from Babylon into this place. 

"Nevertheless hear thou now this word that I speak in thine ears, and in the ears of all the people; the prophets that have been before me and before thee of old prophesied both against many countries, and against great kingdoms, of war, and of evil, and of pestilence. The prophet which prophesieth of peace, when the word of the prophet shall come to pass, then shall the prophet be known, that the Lord hath truly sent him. 

"Then Hananiah the prophet took the yoke from off the prophet Jeremiah’s neck, and brake it. And Hananiah spake in the presence of all the people, saying, Thus saith the Lord; Even so will I break the yoke of Nebuchadnezzar king of Babylon from the neck of all nations within the space of two full years. 

"And the prophet Jeremiah went his way." (Jeremiah 28:1-10). 

There is this man, Hananiah, who is standing up and blatantly LYING in the name of God, and is being believed. (In verse 15 God sends Jeremiah to tell Hananiah, "Hear now, Hananiah; The Lord hath not sent thee; but thou makest this people to trust in a lie."). Jeremiah spoke up and told the truth. Hananiah went on and lied again. So Jeremiah left. He didn't stand there and argue the point, or scream at Hananiah. He just left. Later on, God told him to go back and talk to Hananiah. But right then wasn't the time. 

Later on, Jeremiah is imprisoned and then rescued and talks with the King. 

"Then said Jeremiah unto Zedekiah, Thus saith the Lord, the God of hosts, the God of Israel; If thou wilt assuredly go forth unto the king of Babylon’s princes, then thy soul shall live, and this city shall not be burned with fire; and thou shalt live, and thine house: but if thou wilt not go forth to the king of Babylon’s princes, then shall this city be given into the hand of the Chaldeans, and they shall burn it with fire, and thou shalt not escape out of their hand. And Zedekiah the king said unto Jeremiah, I am afraid of the Jews that are fallen to the Chaldeans, lest they deliver me into their hand, and they mock me. But Jeremiah said, They shall not deliver thee. Obey, I beseech thee, the voice of the Lord, which I speak unto thee: so it shall be well unto thee, and thy soul shall live. But if thou refuse to go forth, this is the word that the Lord hath shewed me:" (Jeremiah 38:17-21).

Jeremiah knew the King had to choose for himself what he was going to do. He told the King plainly what the issue was, and warned him of the consequences if he chose the wrong. He begged him to choose what was right. But he couldn't do more. The King chose to do what was wrong anyways. I'm sure Jeremiah was heartbroken and frustrated. Maybe he even blamed himself for it. But there was nothing he could do. Zedekiah had to choose for himself. Jeremiah couldn't choose for him.  

Jeremiah ended up getting captured and chained by the Babylonians. He was placed among the other captives to be transported. Perhaps he felt rather bitter. For about 40 years he'd preached and warned and begged and endured hatred and imprisonment and mistreatment of all kind... and no one had listened... and now the city was in ruins, thousands of people were dead, the country was at the mercy of another empire, and he himself was a captive possibly facing slavery. That's a long 40 years or so with apparently no result. 

But Jeremiah's story doesn't end there. He was freed, given food, and sent away to go wherever he wanted to go. He kept ministering. He kept warning and preaching. In the end, he was taken to Egypt because the people still refused to obey God and turn from their sins even a little. His very last prophesy is a warning about the fate of Babylon. But the very end of the book of Jeremiah is overall positive. It tells of all the spoiling of Jerusalem and carrying away of captives, but ends with Zedekiah being taken out of prison and very well treated. 

Recently I've felt a lot like Jeremiah. 

Just this week I was obliged to state some unpleasant truth. And the person I stated them to was not happy and began to try to browbeat me into taking down the truth I'd said (and let go of certain convictions). This was... not easy. I love people and I hate disappointing anyone or hurting them. I was told I was "mean," "vindictive," "hurtful," and "lying." My name was passed around to people and I was told that people were outraged and disgusted with me. I lost a blooming friendship. I was verbally attacked. No one listened to my explanations or my reasoning. At one point I was upset enough that I almost backed down. Thank God for the one friend who stopped me in my tracks and told me with brutal honesty what I was about to do. Faithful are the wounds of a friend, y'all. 

But if there's one thing God's taught me this year, it's the value of Truth. God's Truth must be spoken. It cannot be compromised. It can't be silenced. 

It started when He put it on my heart to speak up and share some truth that I was terrified people would dislike. He led me on to talk more and more boldly about more and more Truth. So now here I am. Messiest, painfullest situation I've ever been in my life--but I am all right, really. I'm scared and upset, but overall, I'm calm and confident in my God's Truth. 

"And ye shall know the truth, and the truth shall make you free." (John 8:33)

That's so true, guys. I've lived it. If anyone had told me what I'd go through and tell me that I could be this happy and this calm and this untroubled about it, I would have disbelieved them 100%. Yeah, I am scared and upset and unhappy about it at times. BUT overall, like I said--I'm at rest. Because I know I am standing on the Truth. That is the most restful thing ever. 

I had to stop talking to the person because it was pointless. No one listened to anything I had to say; all they wanted was for me to take back the truth I'd said. I felt very sad because the person was making some really bad choices that were really hurting them. But I couldn't do anything about it. They already knew that it was a bad choice. They made those decisions. It wasn't my job to make them choose otherwise. I showed them the truth. They had to choose to believe it for themselves. 

I had it easier than Jeremiah. But it's still hard.

But I still believe that the story isn't over yet. I am free right now. Free from guilt. Free from shame. Free from fear. Free from hurt. It keeps coming back and trying to whisper in my ear that it's back, but with God's help I won't let it win. I will stand firm on the Rock. I'm being fed by God's word and the wise advice and help of good friends. I'm being loved and blessed by so many good, true friends.

I'll keep sharing the Truth. I'll keep warning. I'll keep loving and caring even if it hurts. I'll keep choosing to do what's right, in God's strength and by His grace. If it means forty years of speaking Truth and being hated and mistreated, so be it. Forty years is nothing compared to eternity. 

And when you stand in the Truth, you are truly free.

The Cake-Flavoured Book Tag

Hey friends! Today we have a tag which I stole from Dessa. I was not actually tagged for this one, but it looked sooo fun that I've wanted to do it for a long time!!

1. Chocolate Cake (a Dark Book You Absolutely Love).

Does this mean a book that actually makes you feel dark? Or one that just deals with dark subjects?? I don’t know. There are books that I really like but that make me feel more or less oppressed because I know the bad thing that’s coming up and it hurts. As for dark subjects, I tend to love books that tackle hard topics. Beloved, by Kaitlyn Krispense, dealt with suicide, abandonment, betrayal, & more... but it is just a beautiful, humorous, heart-satisfying read.  

2. Vanilla Cake (a Light Read).

Winnie-the-Pooh by A.A. Milne. The book is light-hearted and humorous read, but it has some beautiful themes & elements.... it’s a deep book. 

3. Red Velvet (a Book That Gave You Mixed Emotions).

Mm, red velvet is so good. 

Dreams & Devotion by Sarah Holman. Up to this book I loved all the Taelis books. This one I had a problem with because the religion became so Catholic. I love the lessons, but I have a hard time with certain stuff that I don’t agree with. 

4. Cheesecake (a Book You Would Recommend to Anyone).

Who doesn’t love cheesecake?! 

I nominate A Nest for Celeste by Henry Cole. This book is so sweet and beautiful. It has an amazing theme, and wonderful characters, and such a lovely plot. <33 Honestly, I think everyone should read it. 

5. Coffee Cake (a Book You Did Not Finish).

I like coffee cake, actually... 

There were two books lately that I skim read/pre-read & decided to DNF because of content. Both were by Kate Cambridge. 

6. Carrot Cake (a Book With Great Writing).

Oh, yes, carrot cake is so yummy. 

Ahhhh! Ivanhoe by Sir Walter Scott. This book is a masterpiece of writing. Yes, there are stuff that I don’t approve of & it also tackles a couple dark subjects. But it has a masterful plot, amazing character creation, and wonderful language/description. 

7. Tiramisu (a Book That Left You Wanting More).

I don’t like tiramisu!

 I don’t often want more to a book. I prefer stand-alones to series. Perhaps the one exception is the Emily Abbott books by Perry Elisabeth Kirkpatrick. Each one leaves me wanting another!!! 

8. Cupcakes (a Series With 4+ Books).

Cupcakes are such fun. 

The What Katy Did Series by Susan Coolidge! I love this series SO. VERY. MUCH. I love the people, and the lessons, and the writing style, and the descriptions, and the plots... She was an amazing author. <33 And my favourite female main character is Katy. <3

 

 

9. Fruit Cake (a Book That Wasn't What You Anticipated).

I actually like fruit cake. 
Fern’s Hollow by Hesba Stretton. I need to reread this one. But when I first read it I found it not what I expected. It was nice, but I didn’t love it. 

10. Lamington (Favourite Australian Book).

I’ve never tasted Lamington. But I love Australia. Sadly, I’ve read few books about Australia. But G.A. Henty’s A Final Reckoning I love. I mean, it's got bushrangers & policemen. XD 

~ / / ~

Such a fun tag!!! I never know who to tag for these, so just go ahead and steal it from me if you want to do it. ;)